DEAR TEDDY:
I’ve been talking to a girl for a while, though I can’t tell if she is being friendly or flirty! We are going to hang out and I’m not sure if it’s a date, but I want it to be. If she doesn’t think it is, I still want to keep her as a friend and I’m scared telling her how I feel might ruin that. What should I do?
–A Case of Mixed Signals
DEAR MIXED:
We’ve all been there. Situationships, especially if they don’t feel reciprocated, are always anxiety-inducing. Take a deep breath. This is a simple case of mixed signals.
My first and most important advice: Tell. Her. Exactly. How. You. Feel.
This could either go two ways.
One: let’s say she rejects you. Painful, of course, but if these are her feelings, waiting won’t make her feel any different.
Two: she likes you back. Woo hoo! You’re in luck.
Be as honest as you possibly can — tell her that you don’t want to ruin your friendship. Tell her all the things you told me here, and then decide TOGETHER how you want to move forward. Honesty only reveals it doesn’t change what is unspoken, no matter how badly you might want it to.
Would you rather have the pain of rejection or the regret of never asking? Is this girl worth the risk of taking the leap and hoping for the best?
Yours always,
Teddy
